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Things I wish I knew- Now when I am entering 30s

January 5, 2017
i wish i knew

Now that I have completed 29 years of journey and celebrated it in style, I am still standing at the first turn on the road named “Mid-life”.

Much has been said and told by the ones who reached their 30s. What new I can add here?

I think nothing much but my own experiences.

 

We all reach this milestone committing some serious mistakes, saying some ugly words, telling some lies and taking some wrong decisions.

 

But what matters is learning we gain and tales to tell. After all, these experiences are the ones that make every story unique. Isn’t it?

Now when I am here, there are many things I wish I knew –

 

MARRIAGE IS NOT AN END TO ALL PROBLEMS

Marriage is not a magic wand to turn your problems into dust nor its a certificate to be happy forever.

Its just that you have someone to share your proud and shame moments without the fear of getting judged.

 

STUFF DOES NOT BRING HAPPINESS

Buying things does not make you happy. No materialistic thing can turn ON your mood amidst mental turmoil. Now, I am on a path to Minimalism.

 

THE ONLY ONE WHOM YOU CAN EXPECT FROM IS YOU

We all must have heard- Expectations hurt. Do not expect others to change as per your wish. The sure shot passport to happiness is to Change oneself.

 

PEOPLE CHANGE, TIME TRANSFORMS THEM

There were many in my School who got scolded almost everyday, who were not good at studies or misbehaved. I wonder when I get to meet those people now. They are not the same.

Same goes for the ones who were considered obedient, studious or well behaved.

Time has the power to transform people. I wish I knew this and not be judgemental.

 

ITS BETTER NOT TO BE RIGID

I can see more clearly from where I stand now- The moment I tend to be rigid, Life bends me more.

The things I said I will never do were the ones I had to. Welcome the Life as it comes and do not resist the change.

 

THE HARMFUL EFFECTS OF REACTING

My Mother always used to teach me not to react. She advised me to keep calm rather than reacting abruptly.

I suffered a lot due to this bad habit of mine.

 

JUSTIFICATIONS TAKE US NOWHERE

I have discovered the uneasy feeling that comes with Justification. I decided to get rid of it. You can read the story here.

 

COMPARISON MAKES THE PROBLEM WORSE

Throughout my childhood, I weighed Parent’s love comparing with my Brother.

When in my Job, I weighed appraisals comparing with my colleagues.

When I entered my marriage, I weighed Family’s care comparing with my Husband.

I realize its the worst thing you can do to yourself. Comparison has the power to hurt you, to paralyze you and hindrance in your relationships.

 

I used to think that being young is when your life is at its absolute best. I was wrong.

Now, I think 30s are the best phase but I think 40s will prove me wrong again.

 

Share your –I wish I knew– list with me. I would love to read your story.

 

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I wish i knew


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10 Comments

  • Reply Harsh yadav July 31, 2017 at 2:19 pm

    Hello Upasana,
    Well, that’s good to read so many things you have learned till now. And, it’s nice to know that everything turned out good for you. I am on the same verge as you, and i have my own shares of experiences, few i learned by myself, and few life taught me in it’s own way. But, out of all the lessons, the one which is close to my heart is “We are responsible for everything that happens to us”. This gives us power to change things our ways. This is what enlightened me and boosted my self-beliefs.

    Thanks.

  • Reply Prakash B Hegade (its PH) January 10, 2017 at 9:20 pm

    True to the point! Each of them. πŸ™‚

  • Reply Joe Zach January 10, 2017 at 8:39 am

    Yes, comparison makes the problem worse.

  • Reply Sunaina Bhatia January 9, 2017 at 5:00 pm

    The lessons continue….I am nearing 40 now…..We become wiser each day only if we keep these lessons in mind…often when we need them the most, they seem to elude us, another decade passes, and we realize we have learnt one more thing – be kind and forgiving to our own selves…..and smile like a child, love like a child…..

  • Reply maliny January 8, 2017 at 1:08 pm

    Loved your thoughts on entering 30, Upasana. Most of them echo with mine. We keep learning as years pass, don’t we?

  • Reply Maitreni Mishra January 8, 2017 at 12:47 am

    We learn something or the other at each and every stage of life. Loved to read about your life lessons and experiences dear! πŸ™‚

  • Reply Geethica Mehra January 7, 2017 at 2:10 pm

    Upasna,all these things I have experienced myself and learnt my lessons of life. I used to think before that I have wasted my Golden years but it is the present time that is precious.

  • Reply Manisha Garg January 6, 2017 at 8:20 pm

    True that

  • Reply Rajlakshmi January 6, 2017 at 6:19 pm

    Being 30 is like being 20, only we got more money πŸ˜‰
    Jokes apart, I too wish I had learnt some of these lessons earlier, specially the reacting part. I was so short tempered before πŸ™‚ I wish you awesome 30s πŸ˜€

  • Reply dew cool January 5, 2017 at 9:40 pm

    We all learn with time Thanks for sharing you experiences. Life teaches us a lot . Yes agreed marriage is not end of problems πŸ™‚

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